Brisbane and back

So it is Monday afternoon here in Port Vila and I am getting ready to head back to my village on Tanna. I am actually looking forward to getting back to the village life there. I have not done any reading while away from my hut, so it will be nice to get back and relax. Do not get me wrong I have enjoyed all my friends and all of the debauchery that has ensued. These past two weeks have been a little crazy. Brisbane was not that exciting. Well I take that back, I was only there for 72 hours so I did not have time to really se anything exciting there. I did et some good food and had some cold beers as well. I even found a little time to catch a movie. I went and saw American Gangster. I thought it was a great movie.

I ended my time in Brisbane on a bad note. As I was heading to the airport I had stopped a the Queenstown mall for once last look around. While there I thought I would take a picture of the people crossing the crosswalk near the mall. The reason is that on any given crossing there are more people crossing the street then the six surrounding villages have people living in my area of Tanna. Well as I wrap that up a young kid walks up and asks if he was in my photo, to which I reply I hope not because then the photo will be ruined. Well he gets in my face telling me it is against the law to take peoples photos and that I had to delete it or he was going to sue me. I just laughed and put my camera bag in my basket. Well he gets right in my face and I can tell he is super drunk. I start to get a little lippy and ask what are you twelve? Well I guess I was way off because he was very proud of the fact that he was indeed 14.

I decided to just walk away and go into the nearby starbucks and get some coffee. He continues to follow me and I just ignore him. Once inside Starbucks he starts making a huge scene and telling me he is calling the cops. To which I am just fine with. So he tells the lady at starbucks to call the cops and she does not. I try to encourage her to so we can end this situation. Well He finally gets on the phone and I guess calls the cop. While he is on the phone everyone in the store is asking what is going on and I kind of explain it. I do not know how this is going to work out because I am the foreigner in the group here.

Well once off the phone he tells me we have to walk to the police station to which I reply no you go get a cop and bring him here I am waiting for my coffee. He then grabbed my shirt which I was not okay with and I then not so nicely removed his hand and bent his elbow back and told him never to put his hand on me. (I may have used a few choice words in there too.) He then said or what or what? I am 14 what are you going to do. Well I did not know it at the time but all the guys who had been sitting at their tables were now standing behind me and one shouts out I am 16 I will kick “butt” right here. The kid finally left saying he was going to go get his friends and come back I told him I would be the guy sitting here drinking coffee and taking photos!

Earlier in the day I did get to hold a Koala so that was fun. They really are as soft as you would think they are. I also got to pet some kangaroos and see some flying foxes. I had taken a leisurely boat ride down the river to a Lone Pine Animal Sanctuary. It was fun, but I wish I had gone to the museums instead. I did have a nice conversation on the boat on the way back with a couple from California and their daughter. They had fulap questions about my experiences in Vanuatu. While explaining to them what I do and what I experience in the bush, I realized that I have grown accustom to many little things that any one in the western world would most likely freak out about.

One example is I was sitting at a pub in Brisbane. I was sitting on a bench near a railing. I noticed out of the corner of my eye a pretty big cockroach cruising the rail behind my head. It then crawled down on to the bench and made its way over to a group sitting on the other side. Well it was two girls and three guys sitting on the bench. However, you would of thought it was all 14 year old girls sitting there, because they all screamed so loud and jumped up off the bench like the thing was going to eat them.

I guess I did not freak out because it is not uncommon for me to come home at night, check my sheets before crawling in, and flicking away a cockroach or giant spider. Also, explaining the water situation was difficult. I kept telling them no my drinking water is 45 minutes away. Yes I really do carry a bucket of water 45 minutes in each direction just to be able to have fresh to drink and brush my teeth with.

I also told them about eating the green pigeon, i.e., the green parrot, that I ate the entire thing of, leg bones and all. Man I hope I do not come back crazy. I think all volunteers are a little crazy just for signing up, but I think after being in the bush for a while we become a little more crazy. Don’t think I need a straight jacket yet, but we will see after two years.

It was nice to get back into Vanuatu where people understand my now painful English grammar. The biggest one is that to say “yes” here we say uh uh, like the way we say no back home. So every time my dentist asked me a question that seemed to be an obvious yes answer I would answer uh uh, and he would look at me confused and then question my answer. I finally had to tell him that if I said uh uh I meant yes. We also say yes with just our eye brows. Kind of like doing the hey whats up eye brow head nod to your buddies, but here it is just the eye brows, your head does not move. Another catch phrase I love using here is No. It is a long dragged out nooo with kind of a uh at the end. Anytime someone’s asks you a question that you do not want to answer you say nooo.
It really annoys some of the Peace Corps girls in my group, because we never give straight answers any more. Noooo nomo.

On Friday night we had a BBQ at the Peace Corps Nurses house. She has the best house here. Nice swimming pool, with an amazing view of the Vila harbor. We BBQ steak, chicken and sausages, and Jane provided us with a lot salads and green beans and side dishes. At the BBQ I was talked into volunteering at the bar, where her daughter Erin works. It was Australian day so they wanted to have big event. I accepted after I was told I would get free drinks and BBQ and being that I would end up at rumors anyways, I might as well not pay for anything.

What a night that turned out to be. I am pretty sure they lost money on the bbq with me grilling and them supplying the Heineken. At one point I ended up behind the bar and playing DJ. The owner was a little drunk and for some reason thought I was the new “official” chef for moorings restaurant. At one point I was looking for Erin and could not find her. Turns out she was out taking care of the BBQ. I asked her why she did not grab me and she said that I was in the middle of entertaining the bar with a story and she figured if she dragged me away then she would be stuck entertaining them. Either way I guess I was working. I BBQ for a while then shut the grill off as there was no action. By the end of the night I was hungry and thought I would fire it up to make me a sausage. I ended up selling about 75 at that point. I was hard selling everyone who walked buy. They really were a good deal so it was easy. Only 100 vatu. I would tell people come on name one thing you can buy for a 100 vatu in Vila? Usually they would say man your right I’ll take 2!

I had a great time and I think Erin is glad that I helped out. I met a return volunteer from the Ukraine. I had a lot to explain when I told her I was a PCV. She could not figure out how my BBQ at an ex-pat bar could be considered Peace Corps work. It did not help that I told her I am here trying to promote Sausage as a sustainable meat source for Vila.

Well I need to check in at the airport in an hour so I am going to go grab once last meal at Jills Café and then head off to the airport. I miss everyone a lot and hope all is well, where ever you may be at this moment.

Take care and Lukem yufala,


Christopher